Invalidating mother inlaw
The most important thing to remember is that you are not the one in the wrong here!
If someone is gaslighting you, it’s because THEY desire control over your life.
Authoritarian parents want their children to follow the rules, and have little time or inclination for listening to a child’s feelings and needs.
There’s a Reddit sub called JUSTNOMIL which is full of mothers-in-law (MILs) gaslighting (among other, more nefarious things) their sons-and-daughters-in-law.
Unfortunately, it’s mostly the daughters-in-law (DILs) recounting these stories, but the point is that it happens frequently enough (at least by MILs) that people congregate on the internet for advice about it.
If your gaslighter is a spouse or partner, you might face additional difficulties when attempting to leave—specifically financial ones.
Shockingly—or perhaps not—financial abuse goes hand-in-hand with domestic abuse, which can be punctuated by gaslighting.