Dating break up stories
I want someone I can talk to, create art with, and bounce ideas off," Alice, an active member of the New Orleans arts community, told a friend one day. I want somebody I love to dance with, someone I love to touch and be around." "That's a tall order," the friend replied.Within days, at a meeting about a new theater project, Alice was introduced to Jonah, who had just moved to town and was looking to join the arts scene.Because contact takes place on an electronic landscape where communication demands little investment of effort, gauging a might-be-partner's true level of interest is now a nerve-wracking enterprise from start to finish, fueling soaring levels of anxiety.
Alice and Jonah were lovers for just a few months, but the long half-life of digital attention from a distance—"orbiting," in today's parlance—kept her hanging onto the hope of rekindling the romance for four years.Deep difficulty is a great teacher if at some point it can be seen as a learning experience.In a study that examined hundreds of personal stories about the end of relationships, Stanford University postdoctoral fellow Lauren Howe, working with psychology professor Carol Dweck, identified a common redemption narrative.Breakups are by nature emotionally difficult, but a neatly wrapped up breakup—how two people communicate, how they act as they disentangle—doesn't just make a contribution to happiness, it allows exes to grow and move on toward the goal of finding lasting love and emotional fulfillment.If dating is essentially a series of experiments to find a good partner, a good ending makes it pleasurable enough to cognitively appraise the experience and learn from it.