Dating a widow with young children too soon

So sharing my heart on this subject is probably one of the harder things I’ve opened up about since being widowed.

But I don’t write about things because they make me comfortable.

I anticipate that dating is going to be difficult as a widow because I have an added layer of complication that is not the same for someone who is divorced or has never been married. Unless and until you become my husband, that fact will not change. You will need to be strong enough to let me grieve, or better yet, hold me while I grieve. I expect you to make an effort to show me you’re interested. I don’t have time or energy to invest in a man who isn’t on board.

I suspect it will take a special kind of man to even want to date me, and be strong enough to embrace my story. Your efforts will not go unmatched, but I don’t have time or inclination to chase after you. My heart has been broken and it may take a minute for me to share it again.

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But I have to lay some ground rules if I’m going to do this thing, as I think every widow (and woman, for that matter) should. So the possibility of sitting across a table from a man with a nice smile and an easy laugh and chatting about something other than Daniel Tiger or Fancy Nancy started to sound really great.On the other hand, the thought of dating is also pretty appalling to me because I’ve always hated it.If I like you, you’ll know it; if I don’t, you’ll know it (sorry). My poor husband worked his tail off for a good four months for me to agree to meet him in person!So, jumping back into dating at this stage in my life is also a scary and exhausting thought.

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