Dating a man who is married but separated
I have told him I support him 100% in whatever he needs to figure things out in his life.I know that he needs to do this in order to truly be able to pursue a future with me.When a man has truly processed his divorce and moved on, he should be able to speak to it with compassion, kindness, and wisdom.When he minimizes or avoids the topic, however, it suggests that either he has not yet worked through all the stages of grief (denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance); or, he hasn’t yet hashed through the legalities (or possibly even begun). He can’t just flick it off his shoulder as he would a bug. Anger is a normal and healthy phase for your separated man to go through.
If you chose to proceed in dating him, I caution you to proceed slowly and with eyes wide open. Comments like, “Bah, I just want it over,” or “Doesn’t matter, we’ve been strangers for years,” may seem casual, even confident — but they also mask what’s going on underneath and behind the scenes.– Either because of the circumstances or because of your natural disposition, you acted anxious and needy.– Your insecurity either suffocated him or pushed him away to the point that he was willing to break up with you.Needless to say, my anxiety and uncertainty about our relationship heightened and caused doubt.I ended up becoming THAT girl (the one who needs too much reassurance) out as a result and we have decided to take a break.