Being a spiritual leader in a dating relationship
Titus 2:3-5 “Older women likewise are to exhibit behavior fitting for those who are holy, not slandering, not slaves to excessive drinking, but teaching what is good. She sees that her profits are good, and her lamp never goes out at night.
It doesn’t seem like that long ago I stopped being a girlfriend and became someone’s wife. This may seem very basic but it’s the most foundational trait for being a good girlfriend.
Marriage shows the relationship between Christ and the church. Two sinful people are united into one and they commit to each other in everything. Run to Christ and whoever is keeping up with you introduce yourself. You will start saying, “maybe I’m too this, maybe I’m too that, maybe I need to start looking like this, maybe I need to buy that.” That is idolatry and of the devil. He wants you to keep on knocking and one day He is going to say, “enough, you want it? If she grows feelings for you she is going to be hurt if you decide that you never really liked her.
This type of dating will leave you broken and all over the place and I’m not even talking about sex. Love finds no joy in unrighteousness but rejoices in the truth. Do you have any responsibilities or are your parents paying for everything? Some Christians choose not to start kissing before marriage and some Christians choose to hug and kiss lightly. No one is if you remove all the editing and makeup.
Non believers date for fun, for the moment, for a good time, for sex, to not be lonely, to impress people, etc. For men this is one of the things that tells you if you’re ready to seek your wife.
Was reading all those books and articles on being the “perfect” girlfriend pointless? I learned a lot and it helped lay the foundation for who I am as a wife because the dating relationship is a good indication of what the marriage will be like. Any girl that doesn’t have Christ as her center won’t be able to become a godly girlfriend or have a healthy, God-honoring relationship.
But until marriage comes along, what are you supposed to do in a dating relationship? She’ll be in danger of having her boyfriend become her center, her all, her everything which is honestly, idolatry. She knows who she is in Christ and exactly how He feels about her.